Primetime Update

Week of February 6

Missed your favourite shows? No problem. Primetime update gives you the rundown.

Friends

Friends: “The one Where the Stripper Cries,” (Thursday, February 05, 2004, 7:45pm)

Before we watched a few weeks of reruns, Monica and Chandler bought a house outside of the city and broke the news to the rest of the crew, who weren’t happy in the least.

This week, it’s not exactly what the title alludes to: We end up seeing Danny DeVito as a male stripper at Phoebe’s bachelorette party. The setup is quite elegant: tables, tablecloths, tea, and candlesticks set up in Monica’s apartment. Phoebe gets upset that it’s too prim and proper; she wants to see pee-pees. Monica and Rachel send for a stripper who shows up dressed as a police officer (DeVito). Phoebe rolls her eyes. It’s more funny than sexy, even after Phoebe cringes and he goes to leave, but demands three hundred dollars. When Phoebe refuses the money and insults him, he starts to cry. Phoebe says that instead of stripping himself, he could save face by teaching strippers. Phoebe tells him to give them his last dance. The women really enjoy themselves. He runs out of breath and has to stop:and Rachel and Phoebe take him to the hospital:

On the guys’ side of things, Ross and Chandler recall their college days at an alumni thing. Ross remembers everything about all the people he went to school with. Chandler only remembers a woman named Missy. The show then cuts to a flashback of Ross and Chandler in college. Both have wacky hair, and Ross looks like a big dork with a moustache. They swoon over the younger version of Missy. In the flashback they make a pact that neither of them will go out with Missy. However, back at the alumni party, Chandler gives Ross permission to break the pact. When Missy agrees to go out with Ross, he tells her about the pact, to which she reveals that she and Chandler used to make out in the science lab. Ross gets mad at Chandler, who turns around and accuses him of doing stuff with another girls they’d had a pact about. We see another flashback, this time with Monica (fat) and Rachel (too much attitude). The point of the flashback however, is Chandler walking up on Ross making out with the aforementioned woman. Chandler then goes on the reveal that in retaliation for what he’d seen Ross do, he made out with Rachel (flashback for this and everything). When they get home they tell Monica, and then Ross reveals that the same night Chandler kissed Rachel, was the first time Ross kissed Rachel (in the dark after she passed out). But Monica reveals that it was actually herself: and they freak out entirely.

Joey guest stars on a game show called “Pyramid.” (A show Monica and Ross loved in their earlier days). Joey keeps saying the words that he’s trying to get the other contestant to guess. Even when it comes to food, Joey can’t guess the right answer. His partner gets mad at him for losing the 10 grand. Joey switches partners, and still loses, but his former partner gets another chance to win; however he must pair off with Joey again. Out of luck, or by complete fluke, he goes on a roll and the contestant wins the money.

Next week: Phoebe gets married to Mike, and Joey (as with Monica and Chandler’s wedding) officiates.

Friends airs on Thursdays at 9:00pm Alberta Time, on Global (channel 7 in Calgary)

Survivor – ALL STARS

Last week we watched all three tribes struggle trying to make fire, which none achieved. They weren’t given fire at the challenge or tribal council either. At tribal council, Saboga said goodbye to Tina Wesson, who had previously won Survivor: Australian Outback.

This week we see first off that Saboga’s morale is really down after losing one member. None of the tribes have yet to make fire, and thus don’t have clean drinking water. Wonderful war veteran Rudy tells us he drank water that dead bodies rested in, and he drinks the contaminated well water anyway. Chapera, still without fire and water, celebrates the rainwater. At Mogo Mogo, it takes a while for the tribe members to realize that fresh water is falling from the sky. Richard is still walking around naked, and the rest of the tribe is coming to grips with it, accepting it as what Richard does.

This week each tribe gets a crate with their tree mail. The crate is locked with three locks. All outcasts are excited about having something to eventually open, and Boston Rob suggests smashing the box open.

In the first reward challenge, teams must swim out and unclip logs from under the water, in order to build a staircase. There are 5 steps, and after retrieving each log, one member must drop out (only one castaway will swim all five legs). First to the top wins the reward (blankets). Ethan kicks butt, and wins the reward for Saboga. Jeff offers Saboga a pot with a map to the first key for the mystery box, as well as a flint, to be given to all three tribes, in exchange for their blankets. They accept and all castaways celebrate.

Members of Chapera and Mogo Mogo are surprised to see that Tina is gone, and Richard realizes that as a previous winner he has a big target on his chest.

On Chapera conflict obviously exists between Boston Rob and Alicia who both talk too much, however, they still manage to get their fire started. On Saboga, regardless of the flint they received, have trouble starting their fire. Ethan refers to Jenna as cocky after she says they might keep him around a little longer: It ends up taking five of them, but Saboga gets their fire going. On Mogo Mogo, they struggle big time to gain a spark, and when the rain threatens to disrupt their efforts, Kathy insists that they keep trying. The girls then complain all night about whose fault it is that they don’t have fire yet.

Mogo Mogo goes in search, and finds, the first key to the mystery box. Richard plays down all the extra stuff, and says that the real game is between the people. Saboga worries about Rudy, who has a sore foot, which inhibits his walking.

Immunity Challenge: Each tribe starts on a floating platform, five members dive under the water to unload heavy crates from a sunken boat. Once all of the crates are unloaded, the boat will float to the surface. Teams must flip the boat and bail out the water, then hop in and race their boats to shore. First two teams to the shore win immunity.

The highlights are Jenna Lewis coughing and sputtering trying to stay afloat and Richard’s naked ass right in front of the camera. Saboga is the first to start bailing their boat, followed by Chapera, and Mogo Mogo. Chapera is the first to flip their boat and head for shore, followed by Mogo Mogo. Saboga, again, is the last tribe to finish their immunity challenge; they actually manage to re-sink their boat on the way to shore.

Back at Saboga’s camp, the tribe recounts the mistakes they made at the challenge. Everyone blames himself or herself, and Rupert and Jenna blame Ethan. Ethan is scared for his “life.” However, if the tribe expects to win any more challenges, they should send Rudy home. Rupert gets really upset that they would even think about sending Rudy home and refuses to vote for Rudy. Ethan tries to spear fish, and fails, Rupert goes out, and brings back some food.

At tribal council, the tribe talks about the improvement the fire has made in their camp. Ethan admits that they made a mistake trying to bail the boat instead of pulling it up out of the water. Ethan votes for Rudy, Rupert votes for Ethan and in the end with a vote of 3 to 2 it’s Rudy. My heart broke as we walked away, and Jerri, the stupid witch who should’ve been walking, pretends to cry. Cow. Honorable words are said for him, and the tribe takes their torches back to camp.

NEXT WEEK: Rupert and Jerri go head to head and Richard faces off with a shark.

Statistics

CHAPERA
Alicia Calaway – 35 years old, 9th place in Australian Outback (1st Juror)
Amber Brkich – 25 years old, 6th place in Australian Outback (4th Juror)
Rob Cesternino – 25 years old, 3rd place in Amazon
Rob Mariano – 28 years old, 10th place in Marquesas (Boston Rob)
Susan Hawk – 42 years old, 4th place in Pulau Tiga (Big Mouth)
Tom Buchanan – 48 years old, 4th place in Africa (Pig farmer)

SABOGA
Ethan Zohn – 30 years old, SOLE SURVIVOR of Africa (soccer player)
Jenna Lewis – 26 years old, 8th place in Pulau Tiga (2nd Juror)
Jerri Manthey – 33 years old, 8th place in Australian Outback (2nd Juror)
Rudy Boesch – 76 years old, 3rd place in Pulau Tiga (retired navy man) – GONE
Rupert Boneham – 40 years old, 8th place in Pearl Islands (2nd Juror)
Tina Wesson – 42 years old, SOLE SURVIVOR of Australian Outback – GONE 1st

MOGO MOGO
Colby Donaldson – 29 years old, 2nd place in Australian Outback
Jenna Morasca – 22 years old, SOLE SURVIVOR of Amazon
Lex Van Den Berghe – 40 years old, 3rd place in Africa
Kathy Vavrick-O’Brien – 50 years old, 3rd place in Marquesas
Richard Hatch – 42 years old, SOLE SURVIVOR of Pulau Tiga (big naked gay guy)
Shii Ann Huang – 30 years old, 10th place in Thailand

Next week:
Survivor airs on Thursdays at 9:00pm Alberta Time, on Global (channel 7 in Calgary)

The Bachelorette

Last week, for the first time ever, the Bachelorette requested an additional rose. This week, getting right into the action, Meredith’s friends Kelly Jo (from last season’s Bachelor) and TJ go to the bachelor pad to hang out with the guys and to decide which three of the seven guys will receive a one on one date with Meredith. The remaining 4 guys would go on one group date.

The guys are asked to write a letter explaining why they’re the one for Meredith. Afterwards, they’ll have to read this letter aloud to Meredith’s friends. When the guys were reading the letters, Kelly Jo looked like she was getting the tingling feeling.

KJ and TJ’s choices will be revealed through video invitations.

Chad gets the first date. Meredith picks him up in a Mazurati (fabulous sports car), and they go down to the beach for some dinner. They share a gondola ride, with wine and everything. For those of you who don’t know the Italian tradition on a gondola ride is that the couple must kiss under every bridge. After the gondola ride, they have dinner on a floating pod. It is Chad’s first time eating sushi, which would personally make me BARF! Meredith spends the whole night laughing as they share lots of talking and kissing. They seem very comfortable together.

The 2nd date goes to Matt who “takes their relationship to new heights.” Literally, they share a biplane ride over the coast. Later they walk through a vineyard and Matt talks about his parents’ failed marriage, and his hope to find someone who is really right. Matt seems to be a completely honest and open guy. The couple goes off camera and Meredith looks sexually suspicious. They share a romantic dinner at the winery with candles and everything. They sit by the fire and talk, and of course they kiss. She admits she was desperate to kiss him. Holy cow do the sparks fly.

The 3rd date is the group date with Ian, Ryan M, Brad, & Sean. The group gets into the swing of things with a little golf. However, before even leaving the house Ryan M becomes upset that Meredith’s friends put him at the back of the pack. He confronts KJ about Meredith’s interest in him. KJ tells him he’s better as a friend. He’s so pathetic, arrogant, and overconfident that he can’t even look at her when she’s talking; instead he looks at the roof. This guy is a complete jackass.

On the golf date, I find that Meredith looks like Julia Stiles in “Save the Last Dance.” On the bus ride to the golf course, Ryan M interrogates Meredith about her feelings. The selfish prick feels like she snubbed him. When she says she didn’t, he basically calls her a liar. I find it kind of funny that the camera doesn’t show any more shots of Ryan M; it’s almost like he’s not even there anymore. Ian is kind of put off by the other guys’ relationships with Meredith and we find that Sean’s feeling get deeper for her. Later, Meredith pulls Brad aside; and his sun visor is upside down. We find Meredith and Brad are really similar, however, they don’t kiss well mostly because he kisses like a blowfish (tries to swallow her whole).

After a while, Meredith takes a break with Ian. They curl up with a blanket on a hammock and Meredith admits she has a magnetic connection with Ian, but she wants Ian to be more open with her.

The final date is another one on one, with Lanny. They will share dinner for two at Meredith’s place and he has to cook. Although quite nervous, Lanny makes shrimp cocktails, salad, and then halibut. Meredith gets a kick out of how cute he was, trying to make everything perfect. We get the impression that he will put all his effort into anything that has to do with her. They share Chocolate kisses (the chocolate candy) for dessert. Wow, who knew? They spend the evening snuggling on the couch talking about everything from intimacy to dogs. Despite her fear, Lanny makes Meredith feel like she wants to ride a horse. The couple shares almost too much passion; it even brought a tear to my eye. I’ve never seen two people so absolutely made for each other. They bring out the positive but hidden traits in one another. He leaves her still smiling as he walks away.

The scoreboard:
Ian hasn’t opened up as much as the other guys. 4 points
Ryan M still blames TJ and KJ. Jackass. No points
Sean is at a disadvantage because there was no one-on-one time. 2 points
Matt is totally hot, he looks like a thinner blonde Bob. 6 points
Chad just looks too grown up, but Meredith is attracted to that:she’s what, 31? 5 points.
Brad is quite a wild guy, but that’s about all we know about him. 1 point
Lanny is my favorite, if he doesn’t get a rose, then I quit. Just kidding, I’d be heartbroken for the guy big time. 6 points.

So, at the rose ceremony guess who gets the boot? I’m thankful to say goodbye to Ryan M (who cries), as well as Sean and Brad.

Next week: Hometown dates with Matt, Lanny, Chad, and Ian.

The Bachelorette airs on Wednesdays at 10:00pm Alberta Time

The Apprentice

Last week, after an evening of managing Time Square’s Planet Hollywood, the guys lost their 4th challenge in a row, and Bowie was fired. Although the woman won, they were reprimanded for relying on their sexuality to win.

This week we start with a corporate reshuffle with Nick and Kristi picking teams (each start with the opposite sex. We end up with Nick, Amy, Bill, Katrina, Erika, and Tammy comprising the new Versacorp and Kristi, Troy, Jessie, Kwame, Heidi, Omarosa comprising the new Protégé Corporation.

New Challenge: With a budget of $1000.00, they can buy whatever they want to take to a flea market for resale. The team that makes the most profit at the end wins.

Versacorp plans to sell women’s clothing and jewelry, and T-shirts. Nick refers to the women for most of the project management decisions, a weakness that is criticized openly by Tammy. Nick and Katrina look for product in a dumpster and they find a useful clothing rack. They end up buying massive amounts of plain white T-shirts and decorating them. The team sets up their merchandise outside in the rain and quickly loses motivation and confidence. They make decision to try to get rid of everything, without worrying about making a huge profit. Nick and Katrina talk about the success of their setup. At the end of the day, Versacorp has no product left.

Protégé initially considers selling dirt (which they can get for free) with seeds in it. However as the idea is brainstormed, Kristi gets frustrated with Troy and Kwame’s intelligence level. The decision isn’t made until they scout out what sells at the flea market and even then the girls worry that there isn’t the clientele at the flea market to make good sales. The team splits in half to go out in search of a good product. Kristi finally makes the decision to sell small Chinese umbrellas and other Asian trinkets. Protégé reserved an indoor booth and seemed successful in their profit making. Other team members criticize Kristi for her lack of motivation skills as a leader.

Heidi and Omarosa push to move their products outside where there is lots of traffic. The push is successful and the team starts making money. However, at the end of the day when they count their money, they’re missing almost 200 dollars. Omarosa is in charge of the finances, so she can be deemed responsible for the error, but it’s likely that someone else has the money.

In the boardroom we find out that Versacorp finished with a profit of over $600.00. Protégé resulted in a NET LOSS of seventy some dollars.

As a reward for winning Nick’s team (Versacorp) gets to go meet George Steinbrenner (the owner of the Yankees) at Yankee stadium. Trump compliments Nick on winning. We see an affectionate hello between Trump and Steinbrenner. The team spends time chatting and taking a peek at Yankee stadium from the owner’s box. All are in awe.

Meanwhile, back at Trump Towers, Kristi blames herself and becomes very emotional because she led her team to a loss. Switching from Kristi’s pitiful note to a more obnoxious note, Heidi (who looks and acts like a butch hooker) mouths off about the possibility of she and Omarosa being held partially responsible for the team’s loss. Omarosa and Heidi then discuss Kristi’s emotional weaknesses as well as her lack of talent as a manager. Kristi and Jessie go for a walk and talk about how Kristi can defend herself and not get fired. Jessie warns her not to let things get to her and not to speak unless spoken to, knowing full well that Heidi and Omarosa will be harsh to deal with.

Later in the boardroom: Kristi admits that she made mistakes but that she learned a lot from them. Omarosa blames Kristi for losing the money and thinks that she could have done a better job. The whole team voices the opinion that Kristi screwed up in the management position. In the end, Kristi as the project manager, Omarosa as the finance manager, and Heidi as a scapegoat are each held partially responsible.

Assistants advise Trump that Kristi is a good worker, not a leader. Trump thinks Kristi still has a lot of potential, Heidi is overly aggressive, and Omarosa is most likely responsible for the lost money. However, Omarosa and Heidi both fought for their lives, and Kristi didn’t, and because of this Kristi is fired.

Next week: The group is surprised that Omarosa returns from the boardroom. But Omarosa turns around to lead the next task, which involves a charity auction. The teams must convince five celebrities to spend a whole whack of cash. AND FINALLY, there is romance in the house. The clip shows Nick, Kwame, Katrina, and Amy but which two really spark a love interest?

The Apprentice airs on Wednesday evenings at 9:00 pm (I think) Alberta Time

If there are any other shows you want updates on, or any comments you wish to make, please email me at abaldwin@shaw.ca!

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