International Newsdesk – Yo, Blair

Judging from the massive press coverage over the past 24 hours, I’m not the only one who is appalled by the sickening friendly chat between Tony Blair and George Bush that occurred in St. Petersburg yesterday. If the footage somehow passed you by, grit your teeth and follow this link to a BBC News article titled “Transcript: Bush and Blair’s unguarded chat.”

Now doesn’t that just restore your faith in international politics? No? This off-the-cuff, supposedly private talk between world leaders in charge of the Iraq/terrorism war makes me feel like someone has my stomach clenched between their hands and is slowly tightening the grip. It’s not as if this relationship didn’t bother me before, because it did — enormously so. The clarity with which the whole world can see the master plan of these bosom buddies (i.e., liberating/taking over the Middle East) was already plastered across the newspapers and debated heavily on TV. Despite this coverage, I still had the constant barrage of right-wing counter arguments to soften the blow. Bush isn’t evil. He’s trying to save the world. He believes he’s doing the right thing and so does Blair. Right, right.

Hearing this unguarded little chat has shattered even that last niggling doubt of mine that both of these men are sane and compassionate people. Gone! They’re nothing but war mongers. Fed-up with the efforts of fellow G8 members to resolve Middle Eastern conflict without tanks and explosions and bloodied civilians, they are not only speaking to each other about violent plans, but they are debating whether or not to even tell the others congregated in St. Petersburg. The G8 is not organized so that a would-be Dr. Evil and his loyal henchman can plan world domination while chomping down on food paid for by Russian taxpayers. What a disgusting display of social indifference and power madness!

Citizens of the world, may I introduce you to President Bush and Prime Minister Blair, two of the most powerful men on earth? These men hold the fate of foreign and native people, land, forests, economies, ozone layers and fruit flies balanced nonchalantly on their un-callused fingertips. And what poignant things do they have to say?

The following are a few excerpts from the BBC transcript.

Bush: Yo, Blair. How are you doing?

Blair: … On this trade thingy… [indistinct]

Bush: Thanks for the sweater – it’s awfully thoughtful of you.
Blair: It’s a pleasure.
Bush: I know you picked it out yourself.
Blair: Oh absolutely – in fact I knitted it!!!

Excellent! How relieving it is to know that both of these men were legitimately voted in to office.