Dear Barb – It’s Time to Shake Up the Status Quo

Dear Barb:

I am 28 years old and have always lived at home with my parents. I have three sisters and they are all married and have families. I have a girlfriend, but it is not a serious relationship. I’ve never wanted to move out of my parents? home, even though all my friends have their own places. Therefore I was devastated when my parents recently announced that they are selling the house and moving to Florida.

Where am I supposed to go now? I can’t believe they are leaving me with nowhere to go. Parents aren’t supposed to do this, are they?

Randy

Hey, Randy, good for your parents! They are moving on with their lives, just as you should be doing. Your parents have taken care of you long beyond the time they had to and now It’s time for them to enjoy their life.

If you were in school that may be a different situation, but you didn’t mention if you are or if you are out working. I assume you are working and have probably saved up a bit of money through the years. Therefore you will have a good start on your new life.

It sounds to me as though you have become comfortable with the status quo. Try to think of this as a new adventure; get excited about having your own place with your own things. No one can tell you what to do, what to eat, or when to clean up. There is a great sense of freedom in having your own space.

I’m sure you can see that I’m trying to get you to look forward to your future. Your parents have probably worked all their lives and are finally able to do what they want. It must have been difficult for them to make the decision to move and sell their home. You need to show them that you are okay and will be able to take care of yourself.

So, Randy, yes parents are supposed to do this. They have a responsibility to raise their children to become responsible adults who are able to care for themselves. Sometimes adult children just need a little push along the road of life and that may be exactly what your parents are doing for you.

Good luck, Randy, and thanks for writing.

Email your questions to voice@voicemagazine.org. Some submissions may be edited for length or to protect confidentiality; your real name and location will never be printed. This column is for entertainment only. The author is not a professional counsellor and this column is not intended to take the place of professional advice.

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