Dear Barb

Is sex work for me?

Dear Barb:

I have been dating this amazing guy for about four months. We get along really well and rarely argue. We have a lot in common and I could see having a life with him, except for one thing, his two-year-old daughter! She lives with her mother, but spends every other weekend with Brian. During the weekends when Alicia is with Brian I hardly see him at all. He doesn’t seem to want to include me in his activities with his daughter. The few times I have met Alicia, she seems really spoiled and wants to be the center of attention. I don’t think this is right, I should be included in their activities. Am I way out of line?
What do you think?
Thanks Sara

Hi Sara:

It’s pretty typical for a two year old to want to be the center of attention, especially if she only sees her dad every other weekend. I think you need to back off and let your boyfriend decide when and how much involvement you will have in his daughter’s life. The relationship is fairly new and perhaps he doesn’t want his daughter to get attached until he is sure this relationship is going to last. So I would say just let your boyfriend and his daughter have their weekends together, if and when the time is right, you will be included in these weekends.

Dear Barb:

I am in my fourth year of university and have been struggling to pay for my education. I work part time as a waitress in a local pub, plus part time in a bakery and I still have a hard time making ends meet. All my free time is spent studying, so I really don’t have a life. I’ve been reading the recent articles in The Voice “Tricks for Tuition” and the subsequent editorial comments. I had no idea there was such a demand for this type of work. I am seriously considering doing this for a while, it would certainly make my life easier. It can’t be all that bad if 100,000 students have registered. What do you think?

Misty

Dear Misty:

There are a lot of risks to this type of work, as stated in the articles. I really don’t think this is the type of work you can casually enter. You have to ask yourself if you are willing to compromise your morals and values without impacting your self-worth as a person. For some people this isn’t an issue. Is this a job you can share with people in your life, or would it be something you would keep secret? What about a future employer discovering that you were a sex worker? With social media this may be difficult to hide. I would suggest you continue with your current situation, as you have managed to get through four years of University, no doubt it has been difficult. Ultimately, it is your decision, but this is not something you should rush into. Good Luck Misty.

Email your questions to voice@voicemagazine.org. Some submissions may be edited for length or to protect confidentiality; your real name and location will never be printed. This column is for entertainment only. The author is not a professional counsellor and this column is not intended to take the place of professional advice.