Dear Barb – Talkie Movie Issues

Dear Barb:

My girlfriend and I went to the movie theatre last week and she hasn’t spoken to me since. While the movie was playing she kept talking to me. I tried to ignore her and watch the movie, but she kept on talking. She always does this when we go to the movies and I try to tolerate it, however this time I really wanted to see the movie, so I told her to be quiet. She clammed up and has not spoken to me since. don’t you think That’s an overreaction? I have tried to explain to her that I wanted to watch the movie and she just won’t speak to me. She has given me the silent treatment before but for different reasons. I find it so frustrating when people treat others like this. How can anything ever get resolved if you don’t communicate? I really don’t know what to do to get this behaviour to stop. I really love her and for the most part we get along great and have been talking about marriage. Do you have any suggestions on how we can communicate better? Thanks, Brody.

Hi Brody:

I hear your frustration and yes I would say that is definitely an overreaction. The silent treatment is such an abusive way to treat someone. It renders you helpless and them in control. You need to resolve this behaviour before you get married, or you are going to have a very unhappy life unless you do everything your partner wants. Your girlfriend may have some emotional problems that are causing her to react in this manner, or she simply may have learned this from her family, and needs to find a better way to resolve difficulties. I would suggest you look into some couples counseling before you make any wedding plans. You might want to show your girlfriend the question below. Good Luck Brody.

Dear Barb:

Saturday night my husband and I decided to go out to a show. The theatre was pretty crowded, but we found a couple of spots in front of two older couples. Unfortunately they were quite annoying with talking and carrying on like they were the only people in the theatre. The noise from them digging into their bags of candy was very irritating. I kept turning around and giving them dirty looks in the hope that they would realize what they were doing. I could tell everyone around these two couples were also bothered. We didn’t say anything during the preshow, even though I would have liked to have heard the previews of upcoming shows, but when the main feature came on my husband turned around and said “the movie is on now, can you please be quiet.” We never heard a peep from them again. I don’t get it, why are some people so oblivious to their surroundings and what’s worse is these people were probably in their sixties. Just venting I guess. I don’t know if there was a more effective way to handle this situation. Anna

Hi Anna:

Obviously the manner in which you handled this was very effective. Another option would have been to tell the usher and he could have approached the couples, that way you would not have been put in an uncomfortable situation, and the couples would not have known who reported them. Some people are just very self-absorbed, or lose track of how loud they are. Situations such as this are just a regular annoyance of everyday life. Thanks for sharing.

Email your questions to voice@voicemagazine.org. Some submissions may be edited for length or to protect confidentiality; your real name and location will never be printed. This column is for entertainment only. The author is not a professional counsellor and this column is not intended to take the place of professional advice.

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