The Fit Student—Self Defense for Women

I met a woman at university who fell in love with the wrong man.  She said he turned into a psychopath who was hunting her down to kill her and her daughter.  When I asked her how she protected herself, she said she was studying to be a lawyer, but she felt so much fear she could hardly focus.  She also said the police and courts didn’t do much to protect her.

After her and I parted, a male bumped into me, causing me to almost fall.  The next day, my female friend told me that the guy who knocked me over was her psychopathic ex.  She told me to stay away from her as he might target me, too.  I only spoke with her a few times, but I never forgot that woman.  And I wonder if her and her daughter are alive today.

I wish I knew then what I know today: if you enroll in a martial arts class, you’ll turn into a self-defense powerhouse.  I recommend personal training from a martial arts master, one with exceptional form and a gentle smile.  Personal training can cost around a hundred dollars an hour, but it’ll help you master technique quicker.  And, if you’re being stalked or stricken, personal training could save your life.

I recommend enrolling in a martial arts club for three hours a week minimum and paying for personal training at least once a month.  With the right master, you’ll gain fantastic form in no time.

Don’t kid yourself.  You, as a woman, no matter how mild or meek, can turn into a tough mamma. Glenn Stevens, a self-defense expert writes: “In every single self-defense course I teach, I am amazed at the ferocity that the ladies can produce.  This is most obvious when we role play a scenario where we try and take the children away from the mother” (26%).

But “you don’t need defensive (or offensive) tactics and skills if you are able to prevent a situation from arising, and the only way to do that is to be aware of danger and know how to avoid it” (9%).

The first rule: don’t engage.  If some strange guy asks you for a quarter, a cigarette, or street directions, keep walking.  He’s not family or your soul mate, is he?  No.  So, safely ignore.  Second rule: don’t hang out at night clubs.  Instead, go to churches, university libraries, movies, and gyms.  When it comes to safety, location matters.  But if you do frequent bad places, “listen to yourself, trust yourself, and most important of all, do not tell yourself that your feelings or fears are silly.  If your subconscious is trying to warn you, don’t ignore it” (20%).

Here are more rules to follow:

  • “Be alert and pay attention to what is going on around you.
  • Remember to scan your surroundings and take it in ….
  • [Walk] tall with your head up and a confident stride without appearing arrogant ….
  • Know where you are going and how to get there ….
  • Avoid excessive eye contact with strangers ….
  • Keep a comfortable distance between yourself and strangers ….
  • Be aware of exits and escape routes ….
  • Trust your intuition: if it feels wrong, it is wrong” (28%).

My friend who feared for her life could’ve found hope from martial arts.  From my experience, good luck if you seek help from a male official for sexual assault/harassment complaints.  It takes a woman to fully empathize.  Better yet, it takes a woman with a black belt.

Stevens, Glenn.  (n.d.).  Don’t Be a Victim: The Secrets That Predators Don’t Want You to Know.  E-book.