Dear Barb—Cutting out Old Age

Dear Barb:

I am in my late forties, and I have noticed my face starting to age and my skin sagging.  The lines don’t bother me as much as the sagging jowls and neck.  I have been getting botox and filler injections for the last 5 years, but they are not doing the trick anymore.  I am considering a facelift.  I discussed this with my friends and most of them say go for it!  Although none of them have had a facelift.  My husband says I’m crazy and I look beautiful and should be happy with the way I look.  At times I do feel alright about my appearance, but at other times when I look in the mirror the image does not reflect how I feel inside.  I am interested in hearing your advice and maybe some of your readers could write in and share their views.  Looking forward to reading your response. 

Thanks, Karen.

Hi Karen:

You bring up a very important topic that needs much contemplation before engaging.  For example, critics raise the question of whether cosmetic surgery adds to the oppression of women as well as minorities.  Also, many of the newer procedures have not been studied sufficiently, nor have patients been placed in long-term clinical trials that are required to completely support their safety and efficiency.  A further issue is the health risks of being put under anesthesia for long periods.  These are all issues that need consideration before proceeding.

I believe you are looking at this mostly from an esthetic perspective, with the goal of feeling better about your appearance.  However, some risks and complications can occur with plastic surgery and although they are rare, you must be prepared for this possible outcome.  If the unexpected occurs, you could be left extremely disappointed and even depressed because of the unwanted results.  It is important to enter this procedure with realistic expectations.  It may be a good idea to speak to a counselor before proceeding, to make sure you are prepared.  Also having plastic surgery will not change your life or fix your problems.  All your family and relationship issues will still be there after the procedure, the only difference is that you may be viewing them with a more youthful appearance.  Remember plastic surgery does not stop the aging process, it only trims a few years off, but ultimately you will age as we all do.  The benefits of cosmetic surgery may be most widely felt by individuals who have corrected an obvious deformity.

This is a choice only you can make, but I would suggest you first speak to a counselor to be sure you are ready for the changes and risks plastic surgery can bring into your life.  I hope some of our readers will write in with their stories.

Thank you for your email and best of luck, Karen.

Email your questions to Some submissions may be edited for length or to protect confidentiality; your real name and location will never be printed. This column is for entertainment only. The author is not a professional counsellor and this column is not intended to take the place of professional advice.