Social Anxiety but Not Shy?

I found the best treatment for social anxiety—it’s a course.  It’s a social anxiety cure, in my opinion.  But we don’t need to have social anxiety to benefit.  So, by taking this course, we might instantly become more socially gifted even if we’re terrific socializers.

What is social anxiety?  I’m not sure, but I know what being terrified in certain social situations is and what extreme anxiety attacks feel like.  So, I put them together into what I believe is a dystopia nightmare.

I rank moderately to slightly socially anxious in tests, but mostly slightly.  But I enjoy chatting with merchants, strangers, and people one-on-one, and I love talking about work.  But the minute work meetings turn social during lunch hours or parties, I watch the clock for the first moment to escape.

But I recently came across a course bundle from SocialSelf, and it costs $350 US roughly.  I believe we can pay it in $35 increments once a month for about ten months.  I knew I wanted to be a more entertaining conversationalist with all my loved ones, my work colleagues, and everyone else, so I purchased the course.  And is it ever amazing!

On the same day that I studied the bonuses that come with the course, I went to a convenience store.  There, I learned that a female merchant lived in Africa and Russia.  I learned about her family’s oil and gas occupations and so much more about her in a short stint during a busy lineup.  And I also learned so much about a male barista the same day, whom I often encountered but never knew much about.  But this day, he told me he was curious about gunnery and wanted to join the military.  He told me about a new academic program he just started.  And we had so much fun sharing stories and ideas.  Before taking the social anxiety course, I knew nothing about him except that he didn’t like exercise.  In fact, before the course, he tuned me out to the point where I’d skip getting a beverage from him and buy a banana at the local grocers instead.

Here is the most fantastic thing I personally learned in the course:

I learned I don’t need to be so “linear” when communicating with people.  For instance, I believed I had to continue discussing the last topic or item mentioned.  I was wrong.  In other words, we can listen to what someone says and pick out any subtopics mentioned as fodder for further discussion.  And we can revisit earlier mentioned subtopics.  Let me illustrate.  For instance, if someone says, “My son works in oil and gas in Russia, where he and his family lives,” well, we can ask a question about her son (“It sounds like you love your family.  Is your son an only child, or do you have more children?”).  Or we could ask about the oil and gas industry (“I’ve thought of working in oil and gas.  Is oil and gas a prominent industry in Russia?”).  Or we could ask about Russia (“I heard there was a fruit shortage in Russia.  What was the food in Russia like?”).  Then, we follow up with at least one more question, share something about ourselves, and continue the topic if it interests us or flip to another (possibly earlier) mentioned topic.

This lesson is just one item learned in the course.  It teaches so much more, and it’s highly scientific and practical.  Today, I finished the course, and feel it was worth the investment.  It took me four days to complete, and it’s one of those courses best watched several times.  My conversations with everyone have significantly improved—and not just marginally so.

I’m on a quest to provide value in these Voice articles, which takes constant learning and growing.  But did we know that to be a good conversationalist, we don’t need to have any advanced knowledge or insights?  We don’t need to have any knowledge.  We need a roadmap for how to engage people in conversation sincerely.  Socialself.com is the ultimate resource for overcoming social anxiety.