At the summer fair, do Those Little Donuts give you sour-burps? Do Big Macs offer a healthy way to gain muscle mass? Does cola leave you knowing more about your dentist’s history than your father’s? If so, detox!
Western lifestyle spews toxins. We rely on toxins to clean our houses, to freshen our armpits, to sweeten our cereal. We eat packaged junk. And we feed our kids Captain Crunch. Sinful!
We need to detox through healthy food, skin care, and exercise. And detox not once a month, not once a week, but throughout each day. And why not? Detox feels more fun than frolics in Florida.
Better yet, detoxes help cure sin and disease. Not long ago, I felt fatigue, nausea, and vertigo. But by detoxing, I conquered it all. Plus, I lost over thirty pounds. Detoxes make quitting alcohol easier, too, according to Healthy Body Books. And I bet detoxes make quitters out of smokers, drug addicts, and Red Bull junkies.
Every day, I detox. I swoosh my mouth with coconut oil for ten minutes, steam for fifteen, splash in a cold shower, meditate for ten, and eat a superfood breakfast. My mood lifts, leaving me laughing all day.
For my breakfasts, I dine on bran, yogurt, flaxseed, blueberries, and bananas—mashed together. I swig cups of either lemon water or cinnamon water. Plus, I take Schuessler tissue salts, which help me battle fatigue.
Soon, to detox my skin, I’ll buy a dry-body brush. After all, the skin is the largest excretory organ. I aim to not only dry brush my skin, but also to apply organic makeup and pass on perfumes.
I mostly detox through exercise: boxing, cycling, and weights. As well, I swim and do 100-yard sprints once a week. Sweat rids the body of toxins. But now that I train harder, I need ten hours sleep. Sleep sums my most pleasurable detox.
I detox through steam-rooms, too. Steam lifts moods, strengthens immune systems, increases blood circulation, and cleanses pores. My first steam left me feeling sick. But as with any detox, the symptoms subside.
Probiotics also help me detox. Every day, I eat yogurt and sour cabbage. Plus, I tried kombucha yesterday: a fermented probiotic tea. It tasted like beer. Yuck! And I felt slightly drunk, although it likely has less than 1% alcohol. A detox paradox: So much for going alcohol-free for twenty-five years.
Healthy Body Books offers ways to detox in the book Decided to Detox? 100 Ways to a Healthier You Today! (Diet, Detox, Smoothing, Juicing):
- Healthy foods detoxify you: “By eating super foods, you pack your body with a huge load of antioxidants and nutrients and boost the detoxifying function of your body” (location 846, 49%).
- Probiotics detox guts: “Probiotics or good bacteria are commonly found in yogurt” (location 835, 48%).
- Chia seeds rid you of toxins, too: “Chia seeds are rich in antioxidants; they also help in eliminating toxins from the body” (location 897, 52%).
- And I’ve heard wonders about apple cider vinegar (taken orally or as a foot bath): “Organic, unfiltered and raw apple cider vinegar helps in alkalizing the body. It is a good detoxifier for the liver” (location 815, 47%).
- Many detoxes involve juicing: “Juicing is a good way to boost your nutrient and antioxidant intake. The way to get the best results out of juicing is to do it for one straight week every month” (location 866, 50%).
- Meditation detoxes lungs: “Proper breathing techniques or deep breathing can help your body to relax, calm down and let the oxygen flow through the respiratory system properly” (location 906, 52%).
- Exercise might be the ultimate detoxifier: “Exercising for an hour each day can help you to detoxify. It also triggers the body to release happy or ‘feel good’ hormones. The more you sweat, the more toxins you release” (location 927, 53%).
- The skin needs So, use saunas and steams: “Spending some time in the sauna also helps in releasing toxins through perspiration” (location 906, 52%).
- And choose skin makeup wisely: “Choose a mineral based makeup or an organic makeup. Though these products may cost more, these would help you prevent toxins from getting into your skin” (location 1032, 59%).
- Detox your pores: “Dry brushing and footbaths trigger the pores in the skin to release the toxins inside the body” (location 938, 54%).
- The best skin detox? A massage: “Treat yourself to a good massage … it also helps in improving blood circulation, removing toxins and in stimulating the lymphatic system” (location 959, 55%).
Here’s a quick test to measure your need to detox: Open your fridge door and whiff. Does your fridge smell worse than the dog’s breakfast? Like ketchup with a skin? If so, detox!